STOP

     I cannot think of a cute anecdotal introduction for this blog and it is driving me mad. It is a subject close to my heart and the older I get the more chimeric twin-like it grows on my soul and for that reason, I am just going to come out and say it. I am not just saying it for me, but for all my sister women out there. For every wife or girlfriend who dares to voice their opinion, need, or want. All the moms, aunts, and sisters who tell it like it is and sometimes do so with emotion. For all the women out there who have even just a sliver of personality that shines forth at certain times, STOP CALLING US CRAZY!! Stop calling us crazy because we simply disagree with you. Stop calling us crazy because we stand up for ourselves. Stop calling us crazy because we want things a certain way for us and our families. Stop calling us crazy because we feel passionate about something. Just STOP STOP STOP calling us crazy!

      When and why has that become the defacto defense mechanism for too many men, husbands, brothers, fathers, boyfriends, uncles out there? There are very real problems, STILL, with the way women are treated in this society and this is just one example that reflects these issues. We all have our bad days, sometimes they are weeks or months, but I can tell you this, it is not because we are crazy. We are human beings with feelings, emotions, and passions just like you. I get it that when you call us crazy for expressing these, it is a way for you to not only invalidate our feelings, but you think, and believe me it is mistakenly so, that you are taking control of the discussion. I mean right, because after all, we are just cray cray. Unfortunately all it tells me is that you, my dear penis holders, are still incapable of correctly articulating your positions, incapable of delighting us with  your wit, incapable of giving us your time and effort towards a productive conversation about something you do not want to cooperate with. So, where do we go from here, oh yeah, "Gawd, you don't have to be crazy." Or, "Wow, someone is PMSing and crazy today." To, "Man, she is crazy, must be that time of month." Or my personal favorite, when referring to a 'demanding' woman, "Man watch out for her, she is crazy." Because yeah, a woman who works hard, is successful and demands respect is so crazy, amirite??? (sarcasm) All of these stupid little reductions, and what that does is reduce us in your mind. Obviously, if you cannot control us, we must be crazy right?

      Now, why this bothers me so much all of the sudden? It is not all of the sudden, it always has. But, getting back to the point, we have very real issues with the way we treat women in this society. For the love of God, Donald Trump just implied that Carly Fiorina is not qualified to be president because of, "Her face." Or his casual references to Megan Kelly's "woman issues" as an explanation for why she schooled him at the debate. He is the leading candidate right now in the Republican Party, by the way. Awesome, nice to know someone who capitalized on his career of calling women crazy and ugly can climb so high. Furthermore, people who actually have a mental illness  and are sick, is nothing compared to an your wife who is upset because you did nothing to celebrate her promotion, and when you say that your wife is crazy you are trivializing an illness someone has to live with. An illness they have to deal with everyday of their lives, someone who already has to deal with the stigma of mental illness, but there you go again, that girl in the club that just turned you down, yeah, she is crazy. (Insert eye roll) All of this is an effort to reduce a woman to something that you perceive as less than you. And what a dick move that is.

    When we reduce women's worth or place in society by how they look or if they are "crazy" the only thing that is accomplished is the perception that all the hard stuff should be left to men. I mean we are all just crazy and totally incapable of reasonable or rational thought. God forbid we raise our voice. Here is the worst of it from this accused crazy woman, sorry but not sorry. I do not think it is crazy for me to want the dishes to be clean before they are put away, I do not think it is crazy for me to want the person in front of me to pay attention to what they are doing when they are driving. I also do not think it is crazy that my friend wants to draw boundaries about when their in-laws can and cannot come over. I also do not think it is even remotely crazy to turn down a man's advances when they are unwelcome. It is not crazy to demand child support from the father of your children. I do not think it is crazy to feel frustrated because it feels so often like no one is listening to you. I do not think it is crazy to feel offended or angry at someone and to let them know that. I do not think it is crazy to feel hurt, confused, or just lost briefly in this constant shuffle we call life. And I will never ever think it is crazy for someone to voice those feelings, emotions or passions. If that is the bar for crazy, then what do we think of people who walk around with their hands down their pants like a cave man all day, who chews with their mouths open spewing food like a toddler even when they are in the 50's, leave the toilet seat up or relies on their material goods, in the form of a truck, boat, or gun, to speak for them. Furthermore what, in the name of all that is good, do we think of men whose only counter in an argument or discussion is that the female they are dealing with is crazy?