Perspective

       So, I know that the "open letter" by the chick from Yelp is almost a week old and the response from the bartender/writer lady went viral on Monday, and there has been many other accompanying articles, but the all are missing something. So, I also keep reading the comments on all the articles about this subject trying to find it and am just appalled by the mindset of so many people in the country. It pains me especially because they all are missing the one thing that could turn their arguments into solution. That one thing is perspective.

        Everyone, and I mean everyone, has their own anecdotal story. The story about their own life, their own journey and the path they took, but it is just theirs. That is what makes it anecdotal. Nobody else has the experience and I am getting the sneaking suspicion that there may be something wrong with me, since I tend to see more than one side. It is not a "millennial" problem,  it is not a story of getting rewarded for hard work, it is not a story about a how bad corporations are, it is a story about the systematic failure of our economic system that has been trudging along this trajectory for at least 40 years. We can all find ways to work within this new framework, while simultaneously working for change. Some people have and are really good at it. Some people are not, and I will be the first to admit that, I guess I am just not good at it. Which is probably why I am more sympathetic to all sides of the argument.

        I have been working since the age of 11 and at the age of 33 I am making 100% less than I was at 25, and have varied somewhere between 0-60% in the intervening years. It is not because I do not want to work, but because I literally do not know how to make these "opportunities" or "chances" for myself like the bartender/writer lady. I am not inept, or lazy, or dumb, or entitled. I am pretty sure, despite applying for job after job everyday that I can even get someone to actually read my resume. I just do not have a family friend to pick me up when I am down. However, unlike the Yelp chick, I have always worked multiple jobs to support myself. Jobs I have not always enjoyed or been proud of, and I will have to do that again soon. Which takes away experience and wages I should be getting perpetuating this horrible career tilt-a-whirl I am on. So, I get how frustrating their stories are to each other. But it is not as easy as being one way or the other and like I said before it certainly has nothing to do with generational differences.

        Wages have been stagnating for years. Baby boomers cannot afford to retire or they cannot afford to give up their benefits. Gen-Xer's are stuck in middle management because of this with kids rapidly approaching college days that they cannot afford and many Millennials are in entry level jobs and cannot keep up with their cost of living which has dramatically increased in the past 2 decades. (I am 33 and yes when I started driving gas was still less than $1 a gallon in 2008 it was almost $4 a gallon.) I guess my point is that we are all get screwed by the current situation. I am relying on a robot to read my resume, you might be relying on that person that just won't retire to get a desperately needed promotion or raise, and your neighbor might only be working because they lost their retirement saving in the 2008 financial collapse. It is all a freaking tilt-a-whirl and I think we owe some grace to each other, if not a hand.

        So why this one-ups-man-ship about who is getting screwed over worse and why? Is it a corporations problem if the cost of living somewhere is unattainable in relation to their entry-level wages? Probably not. But, it is something we should be working to figure out instead of crapping on one another over who is better, works harder, or who has it worse. And scarily that seems to be a novel thought. It is one thing to give advice and support to someone struggling, and it is more than fair to give kudos to those are on the up and up, I am not sure why it has to be either or for everything in this country. From my perspective I just feel like we should be less inclined to constantly criticize or ignore our problems and more open to realizing that everyone has had different experiences, different opportunities and as a result a different path in front of them. Negative criticism begets nothing, positive criticism can result in an idea. But then again, I will probably get crucified for thinking differently than someone else. It is what we do best-

Recylced Arguements, Recycled Emotions

     I am a big proponent of emotions and feelings. In fact, I have a Spanish word similar to Passion tattooed on my left arm. In a world where cold hard technology is revered like a god, my love of the human condition we know as emotions grow with each passing day. It is amazing when you get the 'feels' or the overwhelming urge to burst with passion when you are doing something you love. I would like to believe that feelings make the world go round. All of that being well and good, however, there is also a time when relying on feelings and emotions can be, well, dangerous.

       For example, obviously dark, negative feelings do not always lead to good outcomes. Sometimes we let emotions cloud our judgements, not always a big deal at all, but when we let it course through our veins and let it consume us, then we have a problem. And I am here to tell you all, the Democratic Party has a problem. And, I am saying this as an undecided voter who is struggling to remain above her emotions to make the right decision in a few weeks. But listening to Bernie Sanders' supporters weep with euphoria in New Hampshire, I get the nagging suspicion that despite Laurel and Hardy-esque nature of the Republican Primary, the Democratic Party may end up screwing itself over, again...It seems, Democrats have now let emotions rule the day. People are offended, on both sides. When people are offended, especially Democrats all hell breaks loose.

          So, emotions how does this tie into the Democratic Primary race you ask?? Well it is simple, Bernie is definitely playing on emotions, and that isn't necessarily a bad thing. He is passionately against wealth inequality, I think we all are. However, the biggest and worst mistake he is making hands down is letting his supporters attack Hillary Clinton personally and very emotionally and not just her policies. When millennials in New Hampshire were asked why they did not like Hillary they cited things like, how "establishment" she was, how big of a liar she is, how corrupt she is, how uncaring she is. Many women were resentful and offended at the fact that they felt pressured to vote for her because she was a woman and how off-putting it was that, because they both had V's, their V was nothing like Hillary's and how dare they suggest so. (I will admit, that is a clumsy stance not being snuffed out by Hillary's campaign.)

          So my honest question is, to both Bernie, and Hillary's campaign, where does that leave the Democratic Party after the primaries? How can you overcome the pure hatred directed towards Hillary in this campaign? The offense so many millennials feel towards Hillary? And I will admit, it is something I do not understand. It is not something I necessarily want to understand. I will also admit, the more Hillary is attacked for her personality, the alleged egregious acts she has been accused of committing by the Republican Party for years recycled over and over again, the more people move away from policy issues, the more I want to vote for her because she is fighting. She is fighting a battle on so many sides and now the one side who should be battling her for her policies, pushing her to go farther, are using the same emotional blackmail against her as well. It is slightly off-putting to hear young women in their twenties come out so anti-Hillary at such a primitive and gut level, I will say it again....where does that leave the party? I am just not sure you can get over those feelings and the Democratic leadership should be scared. Bernie Sanders should say something because it leaves us with a scary scenario. Hillary Clinton wins the primary, Michael Bloomberg jumps into the race as an Independent, all these people who aggressively despise Hillary Clinton just for being Hillary Clinton, vote for him and the next thing you know we are all watching President Trump's inauguration.

              Can we get past the feelings? Can we stop attacking someone as a liar, a cheat, or corrupt politician who has been playing the game like everyone, and I mean everyone, else? How about we say, "Well, I do not think she goes far enough when it comes to domestic policy in regards to healthcare." Instead of, "She is a lying bitch who takes money from the healthcare industry so who do you think she is going to be in favor of?"  Because at the very least, that is disingenuous logic and at the worst you are debasing a very legitimate candidate with emotional rhetoric that could have an after-effect you did not intend. So whom ever you are going to vote for, hows about we keep calm, passionately support our candidates in a constructive way and contribute to good stewardship of a democracy. Our country has a tendency to go off the rails and if you do not believe me, just look at the Republican Presidential primary.

Return of the Princess Who Drinks Wine: Won't Stop, Can't Stop

    There are so many awesome things happening this Saturday. My little sister's birthday, for one. The Polar Plunge fundraiser in Kenosha for a second thing. Mitten Fest in Milwaukee at Burnhearts for a third. But, the big one, the supposed international meet-up of the manosphere ridiculous MRA (Men's Rights Activists) group "Return of the Kings." (SCREECH) What? Yep, though most events have been allegedly cancelled due to the amazingly awesome amount of push back, the group planned an international meet-up in cities throughout the world. Now, I highly doubt these delusional anger-bombs who mistakenly blame women for all of their personal short-comings, actually cancelled their meetings. They probably have some super top secret way to contact each other that is only visible to those with an angry unused penis and idle hands and an over abundance of hurt feelings.

       I first heard about these "meetings" (possible circle jerks?) from the protests articles in Glasgow, then much to my surprise the local news (yep, they were going to meet up at the Brat Stop, where the Polar Plunge fundraiser was happening....super classy guys) and last night saw the petition to keep the leader Roosh V. out of Australia. Now, I do not think we should be stopping these meetings from happening, after all just because they hate women and advocate for legal rape (The supporters claim it was a satirical piece written by Mr. V, but it is disgusting even if satirical. How about I write a satirical piece about making it legal to cut-off a mans junk in order to stop rape all together. Is that funny? Is it funny to make a joke out of those who have been victimized?) doesn't mean that they can't get together and really see who their fellow women haters are. Or for us to see who they are as well. But that is besides the point, my point is to spread the fact that this group even exists and has followers all over the world. Because this my friends, is why I roll my eyes at the idiots who say feminism is bad word, and that feminism shouldn't exist anymore. This right here is why I am annoyed beyond no end for those who call women fighting for our right to exist in this society as equals, femi-nazis. This is why I want to point out that it is mostly anger spewing from people's mouths when a woman calls them out, zero recognition of a valid point. This is why I want to throat punch you when you call a woman crazy for stating her opinion, or over-emotional for being passionate about something.

    To further compile on the annoyance this week, the CDC announced that all women between the ages of 15-44 who are not on birth control should abstain from drinking. Their point?? The baby, OMG we can't hurt the hypothetical babies that don't exist. What I hear, "Hey ladies, because we think that you are that dumb and remember we always cater the lowest common denominator because yes, we still think all women have brains half the size of men (this is a female Dr. talking by the way) you should just abstain from drinking if you are not on birth control because you are too clearly dumb to figure out your cycle, know your bodies and more importantly make your own decisions about your own body and your own lives." Obviously my automatic response to this is wanting to go to Atlanta, stand outside the CDC building with a sign saying, "Hey Dr. Anne Shuchat! 33 here, proudly not on birth control, and boning like crazy" while I chug 40 ounce after 40 ounce of Negro Modelo. Because god forbid it is my choice which chemical and hormones I put into my body. Not to mention my mental capacity to figure out my cycle and plan accordingly must be totally mythical to them because come on women aren't that smart am I right?!?! Why not tell my husband to keep his hands to himself when?? Tell men to also stop drinking because most drunk men think they are horny, there boom problem solved. But God-forbid men ever get a "behavioral recommendation" that shames them in anyway. If they did they would all probably run to the MRAs screaming discrimination. But us, we have to be sober, keep our legs and mouths shut.

     These are two small examples of the assault on women's intelligence, right to peaceful co-existence, right to thrive and just in general what we have to put up with on weekly if not a daily basis. This is why I urge you to open your world view if you think feminism is such a bad word. Because what is truly to fear from treating women with the respect and equality we deserve? What is so offensive about women fighting for control over their own bodies and why do so many men and other women feel like it is their place to give their two cents? We do not owe anyone an explanation for our behavior, a right to our body or anything of the sort, especially reproductive systems. If you have wives, daughters, sisters, mothers, you should never want them to have to feel like they property, owned and controlled by someone else. We are more than just the lady parts we were born with, I am not sure why in 2016 that is so hard to comprehend.