I just spent an amazing 6 days with a fantastic group of people at one of my greatest friends' wedding. The few days with 70+ people there went pretty flawless when you consider what could have happened. In fact the only miserable times I ever faced were obviously on the airplane rides (what I feel like is probably the closest thing to hell in the US) and once at the resort while I stood in line at a restaurant to see if we could get in with a larger party for dinner (which is a pretty impossible feat unless you dole out hundos to the staff everyday). We ended up not getting in for dinner, which was predictable, but anyone there from our group noticed my subtle upset at the situation.OK, it was not subtle, honestly I was irate and it was not because were denied our request. It stemmed from the fact that most of the people in line behaved like craven, mad idiots, hell bent on pushing there way into this restaurant...I have no idea why they wanted in so bad. It was probably the nearest thing to feeling like I was in a pack of dogs fighting over meat as I will ever be. I was overwhelmed with the need to protect my space at all cost. Had I been well versed in some sort of martial arts, the disgusting bastard behind me would have ended up in the shallow pool on either side.
Now, I do not mind my dog hot breathing my neck, but there is something utterly disgusting about an old fat Italian man doing the same thing to me while I am trying to simultaneously hold my spot in a line quickly becoming one of those trashy scenes from a Walmart on Black Friday, but I was also trying to be patient. Which when everything was said and done went out the window as I watched the large group of Italian's waddle and sweat to our place in the restaurant. Do you realize how hard it is to hold back vomit as you gag every time a fat old mans distended belly pokes your back? The same rage I felt at their pushiness and the dutiful way they flaunted their mindlessness towards everyone else is the same feeling I get at the Ukrainian situation.
As far as I am concerned Vladamir Putin is nothing more than that fat old Italian ass. Furthermore, it might be a giant flaw, but I have a really hard time being impressed with people. When I look at a man like Putin and the fat Italian, all I see are sad has-been men, using whatever power and might they have to grasp at what they feel they deserve. The fat man, using his fat tumor of a belly to get to more food that he desires. Putin, a poor excuse, to achieve his ultimate goal of obtaining more power and influence. Do not mistake his intentions, he could care less of the people in Crimea. I do not want people like Putin gaining more power and influence. I hate men like him. Men like him make every ones life living hells. Ukrainians fought for this small revolution. The Ukrainians made it very clear they do not want Putin's puppet doing his bidding in their country. What they did was an admirable feat. Now their own soldiers are trapped in a land governed by their laws.
But, for those of you who do not know your history. The Crimea problem is not new and no matter how you look at it, Russia has been subverting the relationship between Ukraine and it's Autonomous Republic of Crimea since the USSR collapsed. It is the same bullshit Putin used in South Ossetia and Georgia. It would be akin to the US allowing Cuba to have a port in Puerto Rico, then Cuba slowly trying to take over Puerto Rico from with in. Disseminating Cuban passports, purposely exploiting tense issues between the US and Puerto Rico, and so forth. It is like the chick who is getting used by the asshole. He treats her nice, but only because he needs her for something. That kind of relationship that makes people cringe because you know the guy is a douche and cares little for the chick, but the chick is number one fan of the douche. Crimea....right now, you are the number one fan of a douche.
So the question remains, what is the rest of the worlds plan??? Ohhhhh..ok the EU and US backed out of economic talks in Russia this summer....OMG I am so scared, I bet Putin is too. This is where I need to fess up, I totally identify with the the original Neo-Cons (I love you Jean and William) here, and apparently some modern Republicans. If Putin is going to throw caution to the wind, why can't we? If I was President Obama I would tell the truth. It would be a totally Love Actually moment and I would tell the truth. Truth being simple and I would state, "Vladmir Putin, you are being a dick. Not only are you being a dick, but you are being a sneaky dick. Your problem is that you think you are smarter than everyone else, but you are not. I have no problem calling a spade a spade and that is what you are sir. Now, if you think the world will stand by and watch another USSR in the making, you have been sorely misinformed and should immediately fire your advisers. Already demonstrated by the international markets, Russia is not as strong as you perceive. So I suggest before things get out of hand, and while you are cleaning up the mess of a collapsed stock market and run on your banks, remove your troops from the Autonomous Republic of Crimea. You are not God, you are not the "Man behind the curtain." You are mortal and you are a mortal asshole who ignores and exploits the will of the people, period. I hate asshole, I am sick of dealing with assholes. Stop being an asshole!"
Now I doubt either John Kerry nor President Obama will take that route. However, I hold out the Biden or McCain could let something like that slip.
It sounds nice, but I seriously doubt they would! Kind of like a 'cashier'-type person in retail, listening to the customer tell them that they don't like it this way, they can take their business elsewhere, etc, and wanting to say "so do it! If that's your attitude, we don't need your business!" but only being able to say "I'm sorry to hear that, if you would like me to call a manager..."
ReplyDelete{P.S.Joe Soucheray had an interesting column in the St. Paul Pioneer Press on Sunday March9, about Putin}