On sympathy and Empathy

      When tragedy strikes, or bad things happen and the life you are trying to lead is pulled right out from underneath you, one of the hardest issues to overcome is the simple question of "why". Why do things happen, why the timing, and most poisonous, why me. Some of my dearest friends are asking these very questions right now. These people are kind, generous, hard working, their list of attributes could go on and on. There is nothing harder than having to watch family and friends go through this, aside from the agony of experiencing it yourself. The ever wretched "why me" leads to some of the most self-inflicting emotional and mental wounds that the human mind can imagine. Its inevitable path leads to, "What did I do to deserve this?" "What is wrong with me?" "Why am I a failure and others are not?" I happen to think these are the three most unfair questions anyone ever has to ask themselves. One reason, is because in all likelihood nobody deserves to go through the shitty muck of life. It is something we have to do because we have been put here to navigate our own way. Secondly, it is frustrating because we will never truly understand, "why me?" Maybe we are not supposed to understand, but it does not make that haunting feeling that will follow for life any better.
        Some people surrender and attribute things to God's will. For me, that is too much like a Greek tragedy. How come some ethereal being gets to decide what pain we do and do not endure. It also makes the whole, "What did I do to deserve this" question a whole lot harder to swallow. Especially when you did nothing. Some attribute it to nature or the randomness of the Universe. Equally disturbing when looking at the latter questions. Am I randomly chosen to fail in this or that endeavor? It is truly frustrating to have to justify tragedy, but as enlightened human beings it seems to be in our nature to want to know, "Why me or why us?"
       So what do we do when the people closest to us are smacked with an incomprehensible event that, hopefully only momentarily, shatters their hope, happiness, and confidence? I think the best thing to do is be there, and be present. Listen and give reassurance. Sympathy and empathy are some of human beings greatest and most beautiful of attributes, despite what some say. Life is already hard, what is amazing about humans is the resilience we possess to bounce back, even if it takes awhile. Friends and family of those who are in a moment of suffering can and should lend a hand to help pull each other out of these times. No one will ever be able to answer why, but at least we can lend our sympathy and empathy in times of need.
          Not one person I know will ever "deserve" any of the bad stuff that happens to us throughout our lives. Each and everyone of us must remember that. If it is a person worth knowing and loving, they deserve 100% of us. I think it is important that we all remember that, and when tragedy does happen, we will not know why, but only that our friends and family are their for us always and that it will pass.
      

Come On Seriously....

          This is only and 100% in response to the idiotic comments made by almost every male on-air "talent" on Fox News the past few days addressing the single statistic that 40% of women now serve as the breadwinners for their families. I am truly and utterly disgusted by their comments and no matter how much they blog about "feminist" and "emo lefties getting their undies in a wad" over their comments....well Mr. Erickson and Mr. Bolling, this is one woman giving you a big gigantic fantastic F U!
         I am not even the breadwinner in my family, not even close by far. But I know a ton of women who make more than their respective partners and guess what guys?? They work just as hard, are just as educated, and deserve to be paid what they are paid. It amazes me that your arguments for this as some sort of travesty is even accepted. Mr Bolling believes, "If you read into that study," he said, "the reason is exactly what we've been talking about right here: the breakdown of the American family." For the love of all logic man.....we are coming out of one the most punishing recessions. Mr. Bolling, when Dad gets laid-off, would you rather them collect welfare so Mom can stay home, do laundry and cook the hamburger helper which is all they could probably afford. Or should she go out and get a job because she can. Why does it so holy offend you that a mother or wife could go out and contribute to the well being of her family, possibly monetarily more so than her husband? Pray tell me how in Gods name this one statistic is contributing to the downfall of American society? And Mr. Erickson,  your male as "dominant role" is far from scientific or even logical. Do you understand what sets humans apart from all other mammals?? Apparently not, since you lack the intelligence to even understand enlightened human beings. There are already enough men in this society who undeservedly walk around like silver back gorillas, we do not need more. As for Mr. Lou Dobbs, what a disppointment you came out to be in this argument.
         The rest of your arguments are so offensive and idiotic they should not even be addressed. The level of incompetence you have shown towards your "profession" these last few days in my opinion warrants some serious demotions. You are undeserving in your position as mouthpieces for anything.  I would also like to thank Greta Van Susteren (never ever thought I would do that but I am) for calling you neanderthals out. Which just shows, people who do believe in different things can actually find a lot of commonalities. I applaud her convictions and standing up for her ability!
          I am so tired of people being able to bully their crappy opinions on to everybody. You cannot pick and chose the data provided for legitimate studies to sustain a status quo that only serves you better and your kind. Why can we not demand more from these people whose views and opinions reach millions! We need to demand more civility from each other. The fact that they are able to sit their on television and equate women's success with the downfall of American society is abhorrent and incorrect. It is their notion of how life should be for everyone that is contributing to the downfall of American society. Why are they still on the air? Get someone who is a little more serious, lets say about life in general, who can actually put into perspective what is important. Someone who live in reality, lets say.

 For once I wholeheartedly agree with Greta Van Susteren...these men have truly lost their mind and for that they need to go-

A Little Justification

           I am really tired of doing everything wrong. I mean EVERYTHING. As a "news" junkie, well..."read anything interesting put in front of my face" junkie, I tend to take quick breaks throughout the day to either read a quick news story, and I also have NPR on as I work, so I hear them as well. This is most definitely contributing to the downward spiral of self-loathing I find myself wandering down even further every day. For instance,today, I just learned that I am such an old-fashioned, feminist wannabe, loser because I failed to take my husbands name when we got married. Regardless of whatever personal reasons (it seemed like a lot of work and I am lazy, plus I already had a functional last name that I rather enjoyed, not to mention the fact that it is just a name) people feel the need to write an article or blog for a news source to publish, via the web, letting me know how wrong I am in that decision. Wrong apparently, because...OMG...sit down....I am not longer part of MEANINGLESS trend! Holy shit, I no longer am doing what everyone else is doing,. If I cared maybe I would hyper ventilate in a paper bag, run to the social security office screaming for help, drink myself into a stupor, or just not give a shit, which is where I am currently at. But, I do not need to be criticized or shamed into doing what everyone else thinks I should be doing. Why do we continue to believe that we have a right to constantly criticize everything that everyone does all the time, regardless of how mundane and unimportant the topic truly is? Now, I know, we (everyone in the world) should not take this personally. If people ultimately feel the need to point out everyone else's flaws, there is usually something else bothering them. Even though they address these feeling like as toddler would, we should just take it in stride, because here is my point, the polite, empathic, and generous thing to do is let if roll off our backs and do not do the same thing to other people hoping this cycle to negative interactions between people ends.

           Our society is just plain mean and I fear it is getting meaner and ruder by the day. People feel entitled to insult each other on Facebook and Twitter, driving, in line, at bars or restaurants (patrons and staff) and in the office. It is a society conducive to criticizing people for the most frivolous reasons to make ourselves feel better or more important. My mother always used to tell my sisters and I when we fought that, "If you can't say something nice then don't say anything at all!" Followed by a forced one minute hug. Twenty years later, she cannot be more right. Why is it so hard for people to just shut their mouths or arrest their fingers at the key board? I am not one who gets off on making other people feel bad, even if it is justified. I just really have a hard time doing it and on the occasion it does happen I literally lose sleep over it. I also am a very pensive person to say the least. Everything I do in life is very intentional and thought out. From what my last name is, my college major, who I vote for, all the way to the products that I buy. Hence, why I and a lot of other people out there take constant insults about decisions we make in life personally. I am proud of my morals and values. I am not exceptionally materialistic. I do not judge people based on what they have or do not have. I like to judge them on who they are.

       Furthermore, everyone has different life experiences and backgrounds. Who are we to invalidate each others feelings, emotions, or beliefs, which is what we do when we constantly harp on the decisions we all have to make on a daily basis. I am proud of what I have done in my life. I do not need some news article telling me that I picked the wrong major in college, fucking up henceforth, the rest of my life and career path. I am proud of my political beliefs. I know what I value and why. I worked hard to write a thesis on political ideology, I do not need someone to tell me via Facebook or Twitter that I am an idiot or shallow because of who I do or do not support politically. I am proud to have amazing friends from all sides of the political spectrum and it is what it is and we all accept each other for who we are. I love my friends for the people they are, their generous hearts, I know how hard they work at life in general, who am I to tell them they are wrong at anything? Additionally, everyone out there works hard and often times crappy jobs or 2 jobs to make it. Regardless of how much they get paid, they are worth far more for what they do or do not value in life, than what their paycheck says. Just because people may choose a smaller house or a simpler life does not mean they have less value as people.

         Life as we know it is hard enough. In anger, or frustration, it is never OK to make people feel like they are less of person because they made a different choice or one you do not like, no matter how big or small. There are so many important issues that need solving, when we spend more time making other people feel like shit than getting our daily issues fixed, we waste time. Making sure that we take the time out of our day to say, "I told you so" or hoping other people fail, is a waste of humanity. Actually blindly believing that your way, idea, or problem, is the best, most important, or only way, is failing to see the joys in everyday life, such as, sharing in experiences with people who are different, learning more from others and the world around you, and just plain being decent. We need to encourage each other to be different and take risks. That is how humanity has gotten to where it is today. How about we enjoy the fruits of our past efforts and focusing on how we can make it even better for everyone that comes after us? I would rather spend my time on this earth learning and trying to understand more, than convincing everyone that I am right and therefore, more important all the time. Regardless of political beliefs, yearly income, or livelihood, everyone can treat others the way they want to be treated. Lift others up instead of clawing them down. Be human-

In support of....

            In regards to today's upcoming Supreme Court review of California's Proposition 8, I felt like certain issues needed to be put into perspective. On my way to work as I was listening to NPR sum up both sides' arguments, it was impossible for me to accept the main argument of those who support the ban on gay marriage. As a married heterosexual who has zero desire to "create" children, knowing many people who want children but are unable to have them, and working with children in general, bringing them into the argument against gay marriage is perhaps the most absurd logic for myself personally. The whole marriage is what it is today because people have gotten married for pro-creation purposes is offending to all of us who have loving partners, whatever sexual orientation, who might not have children by design or by choice. I married my husband because he is my partner, best friend, and in general, my one person. I want him to be my "in case of emergency." I chose him because I want it to be him when I have to face all of life's trials and tribulation, just like anyone else who chooses a partner. Life sucks a lot of the time and everyone deserves the ability to chose the person they so desire to navigate the good times and the bad.

          Additionally, anyone who works in our educational systems or works with children can plainly see if they have love and support they flourish, period. So, here is where my problem lies. What is to fear from a homosexual relationship when it comes to their kids and our kids? I can't figure it out. Are we scared the Brad and Chad will dress little Johnny in too much pink causing him to, ahem, become gay like Brad and Chad? They have no more ability to "turn" little Johnny gay, than their own parents did in trying to "turn" them straight. Or are they afraid that Susan and Pat will cause little Johnny to become angry and resentful because there was no father figure to teach him how to throw a football? I am sorry, but in my relationship with my husband, I am the one who is more well rounded in sports. I will be the one teaching little Johnny how to throw. If not me, then either one of his 2 grandfathers will do, or 5 uncles and we are not the only one who has brothers and sisters out there.

       But here is the point that is so mind bogglingly frustrating for myself. There are a host of issues that threaten our children for real, everyday that are not getting any attention whatsoever. For example, the general dumbing down and lowering of expectations of our children that is a by product of our own obsessive materialism. We applaud people with money and things regardless of how they got them or achieved success. Some great examples, the salaries of the teenage mothers on "Teen Mom" or the success of shows like "Jersey Shore" or "Buck Wild." (Did the whole possession of heroine, hillbilly heroin, or meth whatever it was surprise us?) We rarely look up to people with real business or academic acumen unless they sell themselves out somehow.

      Furthermore, I am more prone to worry (obsessively so actually) about our endemic drug culture, rampant poverty, and vicious gun violence that many of our children live in everyday. Brad and Chad look a lot better than a strung out mother or father. Susan and Pat's suburban home is probably a little more comfortable than the Englewood neighborhood on Chicago's west side. If you did  not get a chance to listen to the Harper High School feature on "This American Life" I suggest you do so. You would have learned about the school trying to deal with the fact that 29 students or former students were shot in one year.  Or heard the sobering statistic from the Miami-Dade superintendent, "Over the past four and a half years, I have buried or attended viewings for 44 children who have died violent deaths right here in our community."

    With everything that we know going on out there today, I am not only confused but angry that this is the issue many have decided to "fall on their sword" for. I want to protect our children from the real and prominent dangers out there. There are real guns and gangs shooting kids. There are real problems with illegal drugs and prescription drugs. Also, in the years since the recession began in 2008 it is  hard to step away from the problems with poverty in this country. Why do we not fight these social ills with the vigorous fervor that those who oppose gay marriage fight with?  I worry more about the kids who walk to school in the winter with out a proper coat, than I do about the little Johnny in his top of the line North Face gear who has two moms or two dads. These are the real issues. The great thing, is that if a kid has love and support, they can overcome a lot. It does not matter what gender that love comes from, be it a mom and a dad, two dads, or two moms. Every kid deserves security and safety period.

Just an observation

Last Saturday night I was in stitches watching my three year old nephew imitating every move I made while brushing my teeth. Down to the noise I made when I spit, he was spot on. It was probably the cutest thing I have experienced. Coincidentally the next day, the Souix City Journal in Iowa dedicated its entire front page to the topic of bullying. It was a poignant response to a  regrettable unnecessary tragedy that has become all too common in our country. A teenage child comes out of the closet, becomes the target of bullying, and tragically the situation becomes so desperate, the only out they feel as an option, is to take their own life. We can even change the circumstances, such as the student might not be a homosexual just different, but the script remains unchanging. Now, let us fast forward again to Monday, where I joyfully performed the always pleasant duty of substitute teaching. Sarcasm aside, most days I step foot into that school, I witness and experience the depths of meanness teenage and pre-teenage children are capable of. If I was not almost thirty, married, owned my own house, was able to legally purchase any alcohol I wanted, and generally way cooler than any teenager hands down, it would be a challenge for me to walk in those doors and deal with the abuse. I cannot even begin to imagine what that must feel like for a teenager who wants nothing more than just to be accepted by their peers. 

You see, to be honest, I have always been one plagued by insecurities. To friends it may come as a surprise, but to me family, no way. As a teenager I am sure my insecurities played a gigantic role in my behavior, and as a response I think I have literally blocked out a lot of memories, probably for the better. Just thinking about going to my ten year reunion this past year almost had me in hyper-ventilating, mostly because career wise I am so far behind everyone. That is besides the point. I was a tremendous athlete, I had a full scholarship for volleyball, and as a result could pretty much do whatever I wanted to in high school, yet I still felt awful. Which is why, today, it pains me see some of the student who struggle with abuse from their peers day in and day out. The kind of students who are bright, creative, different in ways that are totally awesome, and I know in the future these will be the winners, yet in high school they just do not fit into the little social box, defined by the few chosen ones. Even though their families, teachers, and many others in the communities can and most often do give them the confidence and appreciation they deserve, it is still a struggle to walk into the jungle of teenage emotions every morning. So I have a big problem with bullying. 

I think about bullying constantly. I hope and pray, for lack of memory, that I never tortured anyone the way I see it happen today. The weird thing is though, I do not see a lot of the bullying coming from insecurities. Today, it seems to come from a much scarier place...over confidence. It frustrates me that with all the work so many good people do, such as the documentary, “Bullying” or the Dan Savage “It gets better project,” that bullying still remains a stain on our society. It is for this reason mostly that I am obsessed with thinking about bullying. With so many advocates, the fact that we are living in a new century, globalization, and the general idea that, no, it is not okay for children to be doing this. At some point it goes well beyond boys being boys or girls being girls. It is about getting beyond the notion, to many parents, that kids do not need to toughen up in this cruel world. We in fact do not live in the wild west, we no longer are or have to be a pioneer nation that rests on our individual laurels and principles, the rest of our neighbors be damned. And to get back to my first paragraph, those three events combined to create a really important connection in my mind about bullying. It might be elementary thinking for those trained in the way the mind works, but for me this was an awakening of sorts.

On Monday morning, after being ridiculed by a boy because I had to tell teenagers to either, “use the rulers appropriately or put them away,” I immediately had a flashback to my sweet little nephew imitating me spitting into the sink. I then flashed back to the many debates I have witnessed whether on television, radio, newspaper, or in person about the acceptance or for many non-acceptance of homosexuality in this country. I then started thinking about the venomous nature of our political issues, the canyon of difference between social issues, and my gosh, the heated nature with which we just simply drive and go about our daily activities. Most of us seem to go about our daily lives with an imaginary chip on our shoulder, thinking people do things for the sole purpose of screwing us over. This makes us angry. It makes us angry when we drive, it makes us angry when we watch the news, it makes us angry when someone mistakenly cuts in front of us in line at the dairy queen, and it makes us angry in front our kids. 

To get to the point, our children copy us. They study our behavior and emulate from that. It is how they learn. The cues we give our children last a lifetime. When you drive aggressively, passing people for no reason, speeding because you think it is cool, etc...and your children are in the car, they pick that up. Impatiently stomping your foot in line at Starbucks because the old man with arthritic hands is having trouble getting the money out of his wallet, comes across as acceptable behavior to your child. So what happens when their classmate might hold up the class because they are having problems solving the math equation on the board in front of everyone? I think the worst one, and you know I have to go there, is the Sunday morning activity many Americans happily participate in regularly. Church. The reason I have to go there, not because I have something against churches or religion in general, it is simply that I find it ironic that many churches  tendto be the harbingers of judgement of those who are different. 

Now, many churches serve an important role in the family structure. The development of values, morals, and a general idea of service, most likely originate from a family’s continued involvement in a church. It also can serve as a beloved family tradition and more importantly (obviously) for many, it serves as a connection point to a higher being and greater spirituality in general. This is all fine and dandy and very important to society in general. Where my problem with it lies in the honest fact that many American ascribe to a faith that literally takes the bible at its word, believes homosexuals and immoral people are going to burn in hell, therefore, why should they be treated with the same acceptance of those who hold similar values to you. If you feel homosexuality is wrong or different, chances are your child will feel that way too. When Miss. America and other public figures pleasantly denounce that lifestyle as “unnatural” or “unacceptable” people pay attention. If you are hostile to certain populations, LGBT community, muslims, african americans, latinos, etc...your child will be openly hostile to those populations as well. Just like my nephew brushed his tongue when I brushed mine.

Getting back to the over-confidence, a not so attractive trait, when we keep telling them they are great, when will they know they are not? In an age where probably 50% of teenagers drive an infinitely nicer car than everyone I know except for my 2 rich friends, where they all have iPhones and iPads just for the asking, who the hell am I to dare tell them to stop hitting each other with a ruler? I do not even carry a designer bag, therefore I am not worthy to tell them to do anything. After God, they worship at the altar of materialism. This is something we have fostered, with our watching of “Real Housewives” and our ever present ability to covet everything. This is before even factoring in the open hostility many Americans are displaying to our education force. If you disrespect teachers, yell into the TV that, “all of those liberal union thugs get what they deserve and that is nothing,” or “they don’t educate anyways, it all just a left leaning curriculum designed to create democrats,” then honestly what in God’s name do you think your child thinks of their teachers? Do not get me started on the fact that, at that point, you are just wasting taxpayer money sending your child to get babysat instead of an education, and isn’t that just ironic.

We know for a fact, scientifically, that our brains are not fully developed until we are in our early twenties. It is an indisputable fact, and yes contrary to popular belief, those still do exists. How can we expect kids to make the right decisions when we are and remain poor examples of what not to do. The Sioux City Journal was one hundred percent right when they placed the blame on the community for not doing enough, because we are not doing enough. We still foster the us against the world mentality that limits our ability to accept others for who they are. We still compete to be the best when there is nothing to compete for, like wow, you got to the next exit first you are awesome. For some reason beyond me, we relish in the exercise of judgement. It is evident in every snarky comment made about neighbors, or community members. All of these little quirks of human nature combine in teenagers to make them monsters. If we do not teach them compassion and empathy, don’t expect them to help you at that Starbucks in 40 yrs when your hands are too arthritic to even carry your coffee to a nearby table. In a day where compassion and empathy are seen as weakness, our society now needs it more than ever-                              

My response to Samantha Brick

       Now, I know what you are thinking...who the hell is Samantha Brick? I know I thought the same thing. Anyways she is a freelance writer who is the most fairest of the land. Recently she wrote an article for the Daily Mail lamenting the life of a beautiful woman. She has lost friends, promotions, and countless hours, due to staring at herself in the mirror I imagine. I kid, I kid. Anyways while most scientific evidence points to the opposite effect of beauty, greater chance of hiring and promotions, people being, well, attracted to you, for Mrs. Brick life has been nothing but scorn from women and free favors from men. To be honest, Mrs. Brick is very attractive, as her photos prove, but as someone who has gorgeous friends I would love to call bullshit to the fact that it keeps her from having friends. Below are her original articles, and my letter...if you need to kill time I suggest you read them. Especially if you need a laugh today :)

 http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2124246/Samantha-Brick-downsides-looking-pretty-Why-women-hate-beautiful.html

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2124782/Samantha-Brick-says-backlash-bile-yesterdays-Daily-Mail-proves-shes-right.html


So, here is my letter for Mrs. Brick.

Mrs. Brick

     I would like to point out that, first of all, you essentially called all of the women who were your friends pretty much jealous, crazy, and unattractive bitches. For the women who are not longer a prominent part of my life, I do not think I would ever call them out like that. Dropping you as a friend because they were jealous their husbands were attracted to you seems...far fetched. I might know one or two women crazy enough to do something like that, but I would not consider them my good friend, or the the very least amend my behavior in their company as to not make them uncomfortable.
      Mrs. Brick, the backlash from your article stems from the above portrayal of women. As someone with a ridiculously attractive husband, I love watching other women hit on him, it makes him squirm. I am also supremely confident in the knowledge that he is coming home with me and only me, regardless of how the other woman looks. I would venture a guess that most marriages comfortably fit into that category as well and if not, maybe they were not meant to be. So, the fact that women would drop you because their husbands were so struck by how you look just seems, almost, again far-fetched.
      I am also speaking from the position of having 3 absolutely gorgeous sisters, so maybe I am not as uncomfortable around pretty people as the women with whom you keep company. As the ugly one, among my friends included, there is no way possible I could ever dream of ditching any of the friends I have been lucky enough to find throughout my life based on looks. So I have developed two theories as to why you have been facing such repressive problems your whole life. Theory one, you, my friend, are simply hanging out with the wrong women. I say this because, I love people and I relate to people. I am the kind of person that has relatively little problems making friends, this one gift, also has given me almost a "bitch" or "crazy" alert. It goes off almost immediately. Well, easy evidence aside, like standoffish-ness, bitchy women cannot run away from being a bitch, it is like spotting a dominant dog. It is just their nature. This brings me to my second theory. Maybe, just maybe have you ever considered that the problem lie with you and your behavior? I am not trying to be mean, I am just saying. Again, coming from someone with absolutely gorgeous friends and family, they might not get free shit, like you, but I saw your pictures and they are just as pretty, if not prettier. That is besides the point. Self-reflection is the greatest tool one can use to better their self, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. You happen to be the common denominator, I suggest you do a little self-reflecting.
      In closing, Mrs Brick, while I admire your elevated sense of confidence, take a step in all the women who have ever spited you shoes. Did you handle the situation with grace and poise? The one thing I have never commented on, even as a child, was how someone looked. People are born looking the way they look. If you were lucky enough to be a blessed with a beautiful face, cultivate a beautiful soul along with it. The stir caused over your original article did not prove your point in anyway. I am sorry you felt so terrible and received such unkind messages. However, you were blessed with something many women desire and you rubbed it in every woman's face. To many of us, you have always lived the easy life, you always had your looks to fall back on and they undoubtedly have gotten you places. Perhaps, if you treat fellow women with an ounce of empathy, instead of indignation because they are not giving you what you want, then maybe  your friend department would look a lot more like your romance department, full. You need to understand that we live in a world that revolves around looks, and you obviously hold all the cards. Have a little compassion for the rest of us please.

Sincerely,
Shannon


   

Why We NEVER Move Forward

It is always the same statistics and the same stories used as evidence. But, two separate conclusions derived from said evidence. The conclusion, however, is irrelevant because that essentially is  not what it is about. It is about fitting the evidence to the story and the pre-determined political narrative, which I feel negates the argument from the beginning. It is all irrelevant if you are not going to take the evidence and formulate the proper conclusion from it, regardless of what you personally want the outcome to state.

What the hell am I talking about? Politics...duh. I hate modern politics and everything that goes along with it. I focused part of my thesis on political ideology, I am obsessed with keeping up on current events, and I find the more I do this with anything in life, the more ridiculous I find it to be. Politics is no different. Democrats, Republicans, Liberals, Conservatives, and Libertarians use the same tired arguments over and over and over again. Regardless of situation, regardless of the argument, regardless of the date, and regardless of how long our society has existed. And, dare I say, regardless of the original problem that so desperately needs a conclusion or God forbid action.

Can you imagine the dire straits society would find itself in had the evolution of the entire medical technological industry went into every study or experiment with a pre-determined outcome of what they wanted to find. "Oh, well, that did not work the way we wanted it to, so we have 2 options, 1. Scrap it, it will never work, or 2. pretend it worked the way we wanted it to and we will deal with the consequences later." Can you imagine the outcome if they had this theory when developing the polio vaccine? Impartiality is a thing of the past when people can use the same statistics to define the argument the way it suits them best. Quite frankly I just cannot figure out why we are okay with the whole notion of, “It is what I say it is, because I say it is, and even though you came up with a different conclusion with the same evidence, just means that you manipulated it, not me.” Whose fault is this anyways? Postmodernism? The media or politicians? Our sorry state of education?

I find it quite old fashioned to be using the same tired arguments over and over again. When you think about this phenomenon, ideology aside, it is convenient to do, because you already have a tailored argument for every problem that arises. What I am beginning to believe is that we have lost our philosophical way. To be clear, there are voice out there. Innovative, intellectual minds who are yelling, “Wait a minute! This might not be relevant anymore.” But, innovative intellectual is beat out by innovative technological and that is all we value. So inevitably, we revert back to the same old “Founding Fathers” argument and we go back to our respective corners to discuss our next move, which inevitably has already been used, bringing everyone back to square one. Or circle one, because isn’t that what we are doing, just arguing in circles.

To be less abstract...I swear to God that I will scream if I hear one more conservative use the whole argument, “Well, if we let them do this, then where will they stop.” Seriously, it is not like we are one the verge of a new reign of Hitler and if you seriously think that is what Obama is you are messed up in the head, same with those who thought that of Bush. In 2012, this is a cliche and soon we will be comparing buying health insurance to something as irrelevant as buying broccoli. Oh...wait. Or the whole obstinate argument of, “I do not know how much more clear we can be, we are the 99%.” Seriously, you think that clear and what the hell does that really mean? The latter give such little credit to our society and the voice we have in our government, the other give too much credit in thinking that 99% of people feel alienated or that we really have hours to sit around and let everyone air their grievances while we shout the repeat. I mean, for God’s sake, when you think about the grand scheme of IT ALL, it is pretty silly when people on this small planet are being massacred by their governments, or setting themselves on fire in protest of their oppression. Being able to buy something that you need, or protesting for months in a park without having to work, is pretty insignificant to having to choose, in the middle of a Somali desert, which one of your children is going to get the little bit of food you have and which you will have to bury in said desert. I obviously feel like our country is a far cry from tyranny and despotism and argue otherwise...see above examples.I think we are safe from communist infiltration, and most things people are afraid of. Or have we all just become so comfortable with conspiracy theories that we truly believe we can't let our guard down to enjoy life even in the slightest bit because, Muslim jihadists, mega corporations, and the Russians will take over and soon we will find ourselves sending 24 children to an arena to fight to the death?

And this is the problem with one of the greatest countries in the world. It is not 1776 anymore, and for that matter, it is not 1945 either. In 2012  we can fly to the other side of the world in less than 24 hours. We have corporations with offices in cities around the world. We truly are a global society. This alone, makes so many national issues black and white, not gray. Most of our electronics are made in China, a fact which ironically conspiracy theorist ignore. I mean they could be putting secret cameras and recording devices into our products in a bid to gather information and gradually take over our country, but that is another topic. Anyways none of this matters if we continue to use the same tired arguments and cliches to fight against changes that need to be made. None of the arguments used quite frankly do not trust Americans to make the right decisions, in the privacy of a voters booth, and the fact that statistics can now and are manipulated so regularly makes the whole idea that someone is right and someone is wrong completely trivial. Is there even a truth to anything anymore? Crap, now I sound like a conspiracy theorist.

There is one thing that can be said about Americans. They never do things half-assed (Vietnam aside). Go big or go home should be the national motto right? So, it is only appropriate that we have taken democracy to a whole new level. We let political parties effectively pit citizens against one another. The only new rite of passage now, in conjunction with the right to vote at the age of 18, is to pick sides. In one corner there is God, Guns, Country Music and “Freedom”, in the other drum circle there is Consensus, Civil Rights, U2, and Free Speech. I find myself asking, why are those the only dominate choices? Why can’t “Freedom” and Consensus go hand and hand. How come only guns and freedom? What about Free Speech and God? And what the hell is wrong with listening to Johnny Cash and Stevie Wonder? More importantly, can someone please explain to me how buying broccoli is so similar to buying health insurance?